Before you yank on the lead or hit with the crop think about what the horse is possibly telling you. Humans are so quick to react to our horses (sometimes “bad”) antics, because our sports rely on obediance, but we don’t stop to think about what is necessary to handle a situation.
If my mare refuses, it’s because she’s scared/had a bad take off and was saving my ass/needs to look at something to comfort herself/wasn’t properly prepared/etc,etc. I do not beat her for refusing. Instead, I put the jump down, let her sniff it, walk around it, and make sure that I ride the approach perfectly so she is set up nicely for it. She will go over it. And so will every other horse.
The more you try to force a horse to do something, the more they resist. The quicker you try to make something happen, the longer it will take. The further you push them, the smaller their confidence will get. Take a breath, drop the crop, and take that extra time, no matter how long it is, to calm your horse down and do everything you can to make sure they are prepared mentally and physically to carry out what you are asking. Never fight, never force.
I see so many hunters these days that are so ribbon-crazy that they will lose their tempers on their horses for not listening/refusing/being playful/expressing pain/being an animal and I think it is the most counter-productive thing a person can do to their partner; their horse.
Use spurs and crops as additional aids, but if you are tempted to use them as a weapon or punishment then you are using them wrong. Horses don’t learn from punishment. Punishment makes them misbehave. Repitition and release is how a horse learns. Repeat the excercise until the are comfortable and when they do as you ask release all tension. I guarantee any horse person who begins to ride their horse remembering these things, their horse and their partnership will make leaps and bounds.
Listen to your horse, the more patience you have with them the faster they will learn.